


Is That a Pepperoni in Your Pocket Or Are You Just Happy to See Me?

by honeysucklepink



Series: Team Pineapple-on-Pizza [2]
Category: Glee
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, M/M, pineapple on pizza
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-28
Updated: 2020-03-28
Packaged: 2021-03-01 05:28:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23360032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/honeysucklepink/pseuds/honeysucklepink
Summary: If you read "A Crime Against Pizza," here is what happened when we faded to black...
Relationships: Blaine Anderson/Kurt Hummel
Series: Team Pineapple-on-Pizza [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1680154
Comments: 3
Kudos: 36





	Is That a Pepperoni in Your Pocket Or Are You Just Happy to See Me?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [notarelationship (justpracticing)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/justpracticing/gifts).



> HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my co-author and favorite beta, notarelationship! Here in what we'll call "Fandom in the Time of Corona," we have all the time in the world to write fic. And nothing says friendship than "here is some smutty fic with your OTP!" Thanks snarkyhag for the beta job! 
> 
> You may want to read "A Crime Against Pizza" first (you can hit the previous button on the series).

Kurt fully intended to order a second pizza for Blaine. Truly. The moment he appeared at his door with the misdelivered pizza (and with the faint odor of weed he was sure they had both been victims of Brett the Delivery Guy’s incompetence before) he would have ordered _all_ the pizzas for him. Sure his choice of pizza toppings was… pedestrian (ham and pineapple, _please_ it may as well have been plain cheese) but he was a gentleman. He wasn’t about to foist an unwanted pie on him. 

Apparently not _that_ much of a gentleman, however, as he currently had Blaine pinned to the sofa. That first kiss had been spicier than the pepperoni on his pizza, which sat cooling on the coffee table. Kurt realized that he was starving for something more than food. It had been… well let’s just say it had been a _while_ since he’d had a date. 

“Unh, me too,” Blaine groaned beneath him. Huh, guess he said that last part out loud. Wait what was he doing? _They just met._

“Wait, wait, stop,” Kurt said as he lifted himself off, Blaine chasing his lips briefly before flopping back down. Kurt could sense his disappointment. “Not that I don’t want to, but doesn’t this feel like the opening to a cheesy porno?” Blaine snorted a laugh. “What did I say?”

“Just, you said _cheesy_ ,” Blaine rolled his eyes playfully. “At least neither of us ordered _sausage_ or this would be way too on the nose. Kurt, I know we just met but, honestly, I’ve noticed you for a while. I’ve been trying to buck up the courage to approach you and ask you out.”

“Really?” Kurt was flattered, flustered even. “This is so silly. Rachel and I were trying to figure out if you and that blonde were a couple. Guess you just answered my question.”

Blaine burst out laughing. “Sam? Oh my god, no. Sam is totally straight.”

“Good, because honestly if I had to fight him for you I didn’t know if I stood a chance.”

“Oh, you totally did.” Blaine looked down. “ _Do_ , I mean. So if I asked you out…”

“One-hundred percent yes, absolutely!” Kurt nodded enthusiastically.

“Great, that’s… great,” Blaine looked oddly uneasy.

Kurt was wary. “Having second thoughts already?”

“No, it’s not that,” Blaine hurriedly said. “It’s just… um, _would_ it be moving too fast, if we, you know, didn’t wait? I don’t know if I want tonight to end.” He placed his hand above Kurt’s knee, caressing it.

Kurt raised his eyebrow and shrugged flirtatiously as he moved in closer. “Well, no reason why our date can’t start _now.”_

Blaine scooted toward Kurt more. “No reason at all.”

“And, since we’re on a date, I mean, it’s important that we’re, you know, _compatible_. In _that_ way.” Kurt was now basically pressed against Blaine’s side.

“So… I mean, we’re just checking for compatibility, right?”

“Yeah, compatibility.” Kurt nodded. “I mean it could be worse. You could be one of those people that _hate_ pineapple on pizza.”

“See? That would have been half the battle.” Blaine leaned in, brushing his lips softly against Kurt’s. “Now I want to see what else we have in common.”

Wordlessly Kurt pressed back, his mouth taking over Blaine’s as he pushed him back into the couch cushions. They spent a long time exploring each other’s mouths, their tongues sweeping against each other’s in an improvised dance that still felt natural. It was like they were in perfect sync; Blaine leaned his head back to expose his throat as Kurt dragged his lips down, licking and sucking as he went. Kurt loved the noises he was pulling out of Blaine and he wanted to make him moan his name. He shifted purposely, thrusting his pelvis against Blaine’s crotch.

“Fuck, _Kurt_ ,” Blaine moaned, as he matched his movements. Encouraged by this, Kurt reached down and pulled Blaine’s shirt up and over his head. He kissed further down, taking one of Blaine’s nipples in his mouth. He would softly nibble, causing Blaine to gasp in delighted shock, then soothe the bites by laving his tongue over the tender flesh. Lower and lower he went -- and Blaine reached down to pull Kurt’s shirt up and off, tossing it over the back of the sofa. They revelled in the warmth of their skin pressed together, Kurt lifting back up to kiss Blaine again.

“Want to move this to my bedroom?” Kurt whispered.

Blaine nodded and breathed out “yeah” before Kurt had stood up. He pulled Blaine’s hand and led him down the hall to his room. 

“Wait,” Blaine pulled up short of the door and jerked his head back to the coffee table. “What about the pizza?

“Good point.” In a single sweeping motion, Kurt grabbed the pizza, rushed to the fridge, opened the door and flung the box in, then spun back toward Blaine as the refrigerator door slammed shut behind him.

“Wow,” Blaine breathed.

“That won’t be the last time you say that tonight,” Kurt purred, pulling Blaine behind him.

As soon as they got to the bedroom, he was backing Blaine up to the bed, crawling over him as Blaine’s knees hit the foot of the bed and he fell back. Kurt’s mouth was on Blaine’s at once, swallowing all of his grunts and sighs, kissing down his chest, his belly, until he finally got to the fly of his jeans. He licked along the waistband, sucking bruises into the v that Blaine’s muscles formed, before undoing the button and pulling the zipper down. He pulled the denim away and nuzzled his nose against Blaine’s length though the cotton of his underwear, mouthing at the hardness of his cock. He tugged Blaine’s jeans off and tossed them aside before standing up and wriggling out of his own tight pants, making it into a bit of a show just to watch Blaine’s eye dance at his motions. Soon he was at the foot of the bed, down on his knees and in between Blaine’s spread legs. “Can I blow you?” he asked, staring down at Blaine’s bulge.

“God, please,” Blaine begged, as Kurt’s fingers nudged under the waistband of his briefs. Blaine lifted his ass as Kurt tugged the fabric off. Blaine was completely naked and Kurt loved the entire package. Tiny nipples, a nicely-developed chest, a trim waist and abs still visible beneath the slight softness of a belly, strong thighs, and there, nestled in a thatch of dark curls in the center, was a long, thick, flushed cock, bobbing for attention. Kurt admired the view for a moment, before bending down and licking a broad stripe from the base of Blaine’s cock all the way to the tip. He did this a few times -- watching Blaine’s reactions which consisted of arching his back and writhing against the bedcovers -- before taking the head into his mouth and sucking, alternating between gentle and hard. When Blaine managed a particularly hearty thrust, Kurt placed his forearm against his pelvis to pin him down. He licked his palm until it was good and wet and stroked Blaine at the base of his cock as it met his mouth. He set a good rhythm, drawing more moans out of Blaine.

Soon Blaine tapped Kurt on the head. “Fuck, I’m close,” he said. Kurt understood and pulled off. “Jesus, you are good at that.”

“Why thank you,” Kurt smiled. “But why did you stop me?”

“Because,” Blaine sat up, hooked his fingers into the waistband of Kurt’s underwear and pulled them down. “I want to come with you inside me.” He bent down and took Kurt’s entire cock in his mouth, pulling slowly off with a long deep slurp. “Got protection?”

“Of course,” Kurt said. He walked back over to the nightstand drawer and pulled out a container of lube and a condom. Blaine rolled onto his belly and tucked his knees underneath him, exposing his hole. Kurt poured a generous amount of lube onto his hand and warmed it before circling Blaine’s hole starting with a single digit. The fluttering hole easily swallowed his index finger, so he pulled out slightly and added his middle finger, scissoring and stretching Blaine open. He curled them up until Blaine yelped, followed by an obscene, drawn-out moan. Blaine thrust himself back onto Kurt’s hand, as Kurt pulled his hand away and grabbed the condom.

“Kurt, please,” Blaine begged, as Kurt rolled the rubber onto his own rigid cock. He looked at Blaine on his hands and knees, his back muscles rippling, his thighs quivering, his curls wild and his face looking over his shoulder pleading. _God he couldn’t wait to make a mess of him,_ Kurt thought to himself. He lined his cock up with Blaine’s hole and pressed in, little thrusts that inched him inside more and more, until his pubic bone was flush against Blaine's ass. He rocked against him in a slow rhythm, until Blaine pleaded for him to move.

Kurt pulled back, then slammed forward, _hard,_ and they moaned in unison. “God, Blaine,” Kurt cried. “You’re so tight for me.” He continued to drag his cock in and out of him, draping himself over Blaine’s back and kissing the back of his neck, as Blaine grasped and kneaded the sheets above his head. They rocked back and forth, slowly gaining speed until the headboard steadily hit the wall behind it. He reached underneath Blaine and grabbed his cock, which by now was leaking heavily. Kurt smeared the pre-cum all around the head and jerked Blaine off in a motion matching his thrusts. Between the strokes of his cock and Kurt brushing against Blaine’s prostate, it was no time until Blaine was screaming Kurt’s name, cumming all over Kurt’s fist and the sheets below him. As Blaine came and his asshole spasmed, it squeezed Kurt’s cock so tight that he wasn’t far behind, cumming hard and spilling into the condom. As they slowed down and came off their climaxes, Kurt pulled out, tied off the condom, and tossed it towards his trash can before grabbing tissues and wiping the two of them off.

 _“Wow._ That,” Blaine muttered, catching his breath, “was fucking amazing.”

“You too,” Kurt panted, as they collapsed into an exhausted sleep.

***

When Kurt woke up, it was only a little before 1 a.m., and he was surprised to find the bed empty beside him.

Was it a dream? Did Kurt just have an amazing sex dream about the hot neighbor from the mailboxes? No, it couldn’t be a dream, because he was naked and while he had done a cursory clean up he still had a little dried cum on him. 

He and Blaine _definitely_ had sex. Mind-blowing, fucking incredible sex. Or at least _he_ thought so. Oh god, did Blaine not really feel the same? Did Blaine even really want to go out with him? Or had he just said that so he could have his way with him and leave in the dark of night? Was he bragging about his conquest to Sam right now? 

Before he could second-guess more, he heard the refrigerator door close from the other room, followed by footsteps. The bedroom door swung open, revealing Blaine in just his briefs, holding a plate with two slices of pizza.

“Hey, I woke up to my stomach grumbling and realized we never ate,” Blaine said, bringing the food over to the bed. “It’s cold, but if you want me to go heat it up I can.”

Kurt sat up. “No, it’s fine, I can eat cold pizza. Heck, after the sex we had I could eat a horse.” Blaine was already bringing his pizza slice to his mouth when Kurt looked down at the plate and noticed something extra.

“I went ahead and picked the pepperoni off my slice and put it on yours,” Blaine said with his mouth full. “Just because I don’t like pepperoni doesn’t mean I’d throw it away.”

Kurt kissed Blaine right then, not caring if his mouth was full. “Thank you,” he said. 

As they sat in bed together, naked and eating pizza, Kurt thought to himself, _he’s a keeper._


End file.
